Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Waiting


My dad very rarely calls me, so when I saw his number on my cell phone at 2pm, I had this really bad feeling.  He called to tell me that my mom was in the hospital.  Apparently, she has had a heart murmur that she never told my brother and I about and after feeling faint this morning, she went to the doctor.  The doctor sent her straight to the hospital.  I was able t get very little information from my dad and he was already at home. When I asked him if he was planning on going back to sit with my mom, he said "No, she doesn't want o be fussed over."  So what???  Ignore her!  I do it all the time.  Go anyway.  He's a practical Midwesterner to the core and if you tell him not to come back, he won't.  I called my brother and gave him some instructions.  Seeing as I have spent the most time in hospitals of all of my family, I told him to bring her a bathrobe, comfy socks and a pillow.  He said he would.  I hung up with my brother and called M.  We agreed that we would skip the company Christmas party this weekend and go to my hometown to stay with my parents.  They were scheduled to come to Houston and babysit so we could attend the party, but I am not comfortable with that.  I think my mom is more likely to rest in her own home (she is always trying to clean and do laundry at ours) and seeing the kids will cheer her up a lot. 

When I spoke with my mom she sounded good and apologized, of course, because moms are not supposed to get sick, right?  I asked her questions and got a lot more information from her.  She said that she was going to tell us about the murmur, but just hadn't yet (grrrr) and had been seeing a cardiologist about it.  They told her to come in with any symptoms, so I am really glad that she listened and went in this morning.  They think she has Aortic Stenosis and will be doing a dye test to see if there is any blockage.  Her EKG and Echo came back ok, and they know her general heart function is good.

This is all very scary.  Being 3 hours away makes it worse.  I am so glad that my brother is in town and can help and be my eyes and ears.  My fear is that they won't ask questions, or, if they do, they won't ask the right questions.  I am a big believer in making the doctor interact and tell you what is going on.  My experience with specialists is that they would rather throw a bunch of medical terms at you and leave out the explanation.  As of right now, I am going to stay put unless they find something they don't like in the tests.  Otherwise, we are taking off on Friday afternoon and visiting for the weekend.  My mom sounded really happy about that. 

I've seen others go through this, but watching your own parents get older and dealing with the reality that they won't be around forever is hard.  Intellectually, you know that they can't live forever, but facing the reality of that is much harder than I imagined. 

10 comments:

  1. (((hugs)))

    I can't imagine how scared you are right now. I'm praying for only good test results for your Mom. I think a visit this weekend sounds exactly what you and your Mom could use.

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  2. Hoping everything gets sorted out. It is scary. My dad had quadruple bypass 3 years ago after going in for mild chest pain. Right after surgery was pretty tough, but he did wonderfully and is now right as rain. Hang in there.

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  3. I am keeping you and your Mom in my thoughts and prayers. Its so hard to be away from family during times like this. Hope she continues to get good new from the doctor.

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  4. Sending you loads of hugs and prayers.

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  5. thinking of you and your Mom. (((hugs)))

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  6. I'll be keeping her, and you, in my thoughts and prayers. It's so tough to watch the 'leaders' in our lives not feeling well, especially when it's something scary - like hearts!
    Glad she went in when she did and is being watched...
    xoxo

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  7. Funny how moms always like to act like they are invincible not matter how old they are, huh? I have a mom like that too who lives far away so I understand how hard this must be for you not to be there to help. I hope everything is OK and she gets the rest and answers she needs.

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  8. EEK. How scary. My mom had a silimar incident last year with heart palpitations which they decided to NOT tell me about until she was also in the hospital. Parents! So Stubborn! Hope all is better.

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  9. Sending tons of good thoughts and healing prayers to your mom and tons of calming thoughts to you!

    Thinking of you all!!

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